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Color Me Sexy: Left On Read Libido

Admit it. The things that he/she used to do don't turn you on anymore. Don't overthink it. Don't get in denial about it. It happens more often then you think. Let's talk libido.

It is normal for desire to fluctuate perhaps due to changes in hormone levels, medication, your health, lifestyle changes and what's happening in your relationship and in your life.
  • Libido is the sexual instinct or erotic desire and pleasure. Your libido is otherwise known your 'sex drive'.

Loss or reduction of libido can be experienced at any age and may result in:

  • reduced desire to have sex

  • sexual experiences that are no longer satisfying or pleasurable

Many women will experience low libido at some time in their lives. This may be over a long period of time or short-term such as after the birth of a baby, during a stressful life period or when a relationship is rocky.


If you have low desire but still enjoy sex, try:

  • 'decision-driven' sex rather than waiting to have 'desire-driven' sex – you make some decisions by saying to yourself: "Sex is good for our relationship, so even though I can't be bothered, I will suggest making love tonight"

  • sex for affection or intimacy or because sex is good for your relationship or because you enjoy sex

  • manual or oral stimulation rather than intercourse

Realize that sex is not only penetrative intercourse but includes touching, kissing, holding, trusting and/or oral stimulation. Talk about this with your partner. Take it in turns to make love to the other with no expectations.

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