“If I could just have 15 minutes to myself, I’d be forever grateful. Between my job, taking care of him, & college I can’t close my eyes. Quality time requires a quality person right? I feel guilty for not even being that much. He’s at least trying. I’m no PS5 but I at least want to be able to turn him on. The showers have gotten longer and the naps have gotten shorter. I still haven’t figured out how to fit in my man. I’d love to say he knows and understands but he doesn’t. If we’re not arguing, we’re not speaking. He’s drinking. I’m leaving. Yet somehow we always end up in the same bed together at night. It’s like sleeping next to a piece of ice. I guess we’re trying to see who can be the coldest.
The other night I found a birthday card from his boss. Damn. That was 3 days ago and I didn’t even notice. The fact that my lack of noticing brought it to his attention like a deer in headlights scared me. I wonder if I started trying and making a way, would he even notice? Nevermind, I give up.”